Hi there 

Despite our varying beliefs and upbringings, we all seem to take advantage of this time of year to holiday, to see friends and family we have not found enough time for and to indulge in all the good things in life pretty shamelessly. Retail sales boom, even in a recession, and by this time the majority of us have plans for new year’s eve. We make phone calls we have been meaning to find time for and send ecards to people we have been promising to see. We have more time for facebook, status updates and cute applications as tokens of care. Presents, food, quiet time and loved ones become the centre of attention and all of a sudden we have all the time in the world to talk to one another.  

And what do we choose to talk about? Our hopes and dreams of course! Hopes that next year will be better than this one drawing to an end. Wishes to win lottos and make money from magic. Dreams of being less stressed about llife. Desires to leave this past year behind and start afresh.

It’s all the talk these days. Everyone is either winding down from the year or gearing up for the next one. Even though there is much excitement about the future, the conversations are all based on the benchmark of the months that have flown past. No one got away unscathed by loss of some kind, financial burden or emotional turmoil. However ... no one was without blessings, miracles and moments of happiness and laughter either. In the midst of a year filled with chaos, change and daunting choices, I found myself focusing on the future and working so hard to get to where I was going in order to make the current situations better. 

Greg gives a look while listening to me at times. It’s not condescending. It’s not belittling. It’s not pleasant either! It’s a look that tells a story. It tells a story of a woman who has so much going for her; who is smart and beautiful; who wakes up every day and does what she loves; who never gives up and who knows that she can manifest any dream into reality. She has big dreams. She has a world of love to give. She knows what she has to offer. She’s getting the look though!

During ‘the look’ part of the conversation, Greg doesn’t say anything. Not because he’s trying to intimidate me or make me think about what I’m saying. He’s genuinely fallen into silence and confusion. My best friend IS confused at to the way in which I WAS expressing all of my excitement. Yes, you’ve got it. Greg gets the look when he is trying to work out how I am able to see all the wonderful things in my life, yet I am always setting the benchmark on the past and working away from something. I used to be very overweight, I never groomed myself because of my low esteem, I was bitterly unhappy in my unfulfilled career choices, money issues hounded me and relationships were in disarray. Then I started moving to improve my life.

Mistake of all mistakes ... and the resolution to Greg’s ‘look’: I was moving AWAY from the issues.

Moving away from the weight issues because I never want to look that way again.

Moving away from the money issues because the stress of it is unbearable.

Moving away from past patterns to avoid the repetitive issues in my relationships. 

“Stop!” said the look.

“Stop moving away from, because as long as you do, you will only perpetuate the cycle,” Greg told me.

“Start!” said my special friend and great teacher.

“Start moving towards the exciting dreams you have and the image you hold of yourself,” he guided me.

“Leave the past where it belongs and move towards ...”

Greg gave me the tool to change my life that day and since then I have made such wonderful plans and progress. I cannot wait for next year and desperately need a break. Not because the year was so trying but because I want to be well-rested for the incredible adventures next year holds for me.

In this time when we give so many gifts and good wishes to everyone around us, please stop and give yourself a gift too. When you wish everyone a happy new year, please stop and wish yourself. When you rest, do it to get the energy you are going to use in making your dreams come true. When you make plans, create them by looking forward at the wonder of all you can achieve, and when you indulge in festive foods, do it because it’s delicious and not because it’s the last binge before the fat-busting begins!!!

“Merry, merry” in whatever you believe my friends and enjoy the journey as you move towards an amazing you! 

Contemplate this …

Everything is a gift, even if you wish you could return it.

Gregs view on being goal-less

Everything stands still when we have no passion. The world around us appears to stick in a pattern – a frustrating, dull, repetitive pattern. So we plan and push things to get the wheel of life spinning again. We push so hard and plan the next move but nothing happens and then the frustration grows. After pushing and planning for what seems like forever we collapse in a heap of frustrated despair, ready to give up when … the world starts moving again. 

These moments are important indicators of how to approach life. Zen doctrine speaks of being “goal-less” and “going with the flow” but this doctrine needs careful interpretation. Self-awareness brings with it a broad, overarching Soul purpose – a reason for living that is so non-specific yet motivating. The broadness of this purpose is important – it is not something material but an inner desire so deep it exists regardless of what is happening around you. It rests deep in your subconscious; an unwavering light that the darkness can never put out. 

When Zen speaks of being “goal-less” it does so in the context of being aware of this Soul purpose because then all other goals and planning become immaterial. Once in touch with your Soul purpose, whatever you do will be another step towards reaching it. But my point is that there still is purpose; you are still moving towards something – you are not some free agent just floating through life. What is also a relief to understand is that this purpose should never overshadow the golden rule of life to have fun. You may choose not to achieve your purpose in this lifetime – this is the power of choice that we have given ourselves.

“Going with the flow” also needs some explanation for the purposes of this discussion. Think of a stick floating on the surface of a river. The river is flowing in a direction – towards the sea. It always flows in that direction until it reaches the sea – its Soul purpose. And so the stick also always heads in that direction. It may choose to get stuck between some rocks for a while until heavy rains lift the water level and it moves over them. It may also choose to take the slow route by following the inner edge of a bend in the river where the current is slower and the reeds are thicker. It may choose to beach itself during a storm and stay there for years before the river gets to that height again. But in all cases it is still going with the flow but it is sometimes choosing to resist the push of the river. That is the “stuckness” that we feel: the river is flowing around us but we have chosen to get caught in the reeds.

So, I have mentioned passion, Soul purpose in the context of being “goal-less”, and “going with the flow”. These are the elements of happiness. Think of it this way: you know you are going to eventually get to achieving your purpose (getting to the sea) because you have the faith that you are heading that way, a knowing that every river does; you have the choice to follow any route you want to while floating on that river (you can even beach yourself) but you will always be following that river to the sea; in making those choices you may make things more difficult for yourself by getting caught in reeds of behind rocks but it is always your choice; and, your passion for floating on the river will ensure that you will continue floating no matter what. What I’m saying is that understanding your Soul purpose is the greatest gift you can give yourself because it makes every event in your life worthwhile. It also allows you to have fun along the way without the stress of having to plan and analyse your every move. 

You already know what your Soul purpose is, all you have to do is listen. Use this time in the holidays to listen; to slow down and just float on the river of life, without the bother and stress of planning. Despite your best efforts, 2010 will take care of itself … and you will continue to float with the river. Have fun in 2010!

Look out!

Greg and I are so excited about the changes in Jodene.co.za and Oh God Knows that await you on your return from your holidays. We have thrilling business ventures to reveal, a redesign of our corporate image to unveil and long awaited personal development talks to announce.

We have been blown away at the number of people who follow us and have held every message of thanks and acknowledgement of our work very dear to our hearts. You have been such a part of our magnificent 2009 and we cannot wait to continue our journey of dreams with you.  

Our wish for you

Have fun!!!!!!

Move towards

Jodene & Greg